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Mind Guru Dr. Sudhir Arora, MBBS
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Physical & Mental Abuse

Are you willing to learn how to come out of an abusive relationship?

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Today's Mind Secret
Every abusive relationship stands on the foundation of one person's "I am a helpless victim" mentality. Learn today to break out of your self-imposed shackles of self-pity and "Poor me" mental make-up.........




Physical & Mental Abuse
The more you take it,
the more you get it.

[Want to know more about this topic's practical application in your life? ... Read more about Dr. Arora's Personal Growth Training here]

I have been getting mentally and physically abused in my life for a long time. Why is it so?

Mental or physical abuse can come from parents, other elders of the family, teachers, neighbors, bullying friends, senior officers, etc. It can be in the shape of
  • Physical beatings in any way, any shape or any degree
  • Sexual assault
  • Often heavy punishments
  • Food deprivation
  • Isolating in a closed room or wardrobe
  • Mentally degrading phrases
  • Public ridicule or insult
  • Hostel ragging
  • Criticism
  • Comparison with others
  • Condemnation
  • Creating guilt and shame on sexual, religious or other issues, etc.
So you can see almost all children have been abused to at least some degree in their childhood – that too in the name of ‘love’ or ‘discipline’ or ‘for their own future good’!
Most of the parents stop this highly damaging game quite early as they soon realize that it is deeply hurting the child’s potential. However, unfortunately in some cases it becomes more virulent and more sadistic, like in your case.
Many people very often take advantage of your passive and submissive nature right from childhood. They take undue advantage of your innocence. Often physical force or mental torture is used to subdue the timid helpless child within you. As they grow up most human beings learn by trial and error how to deal successfully with such bullies. But some of you do not learn even in your adulthood how to become assertive.
  • You fail to stand up for your self-respect. You cannot say ‘No’ when you want to say ‘No’ and ‘Yes’ when you do want to say ‘Yes’.
In such case people can keep on suppressing, compressing and oppressing you even for your whole life.

What happened to my mind when I was so abused while growing up?

Mental or physical abuse of any degree is the strongest poison which greatly harms the growing child’s innocence and trust on other human beings. It leaves permanent life-long scars on the child’s psyche.
Thus, your love for yourself - called self-love or self-esteem - took a big dive. Because of low self-esteem you started believing firmly d-e-e-e-e-e-p inside you that
  • ‘I don’t deserve a happy life’
  • ‘I am born to be a victim
  • ‘I am inherently weak’ and
  • ‘I am powerless against my victimizers’
Not only this, your poor self-esteem made you believe erroneously that
  • 'They love me very much. They are right in punishing me because I am silly, stupid and have low intelligence’
  • ‘They are doing this unpleasant task as their sad duty because they only want to discipline me’
  • ‘It’s all for my own good future life’, etc.

So what happened consequently?

Whatever you believed deeply came true in your life. It’s because of this most critical point:
  • Your outer world is a reflection of your inner world.
Whatever you believe rightly or wrongly changes your very basic fundamental ‘State of mind’ which can only be either of the two - ‘Breakthrough’ or ‘Breakdown’.

I] Breakthrough state of mind

It means your vibrations are positive, high energy of a winner or a victor of circumstances.
You believe d-e-e-e-e-e-ply that you deserve more success and happiness. You actually achieve what you believe.

II] Breakdown state of mind

It means your vibrations are negative, low energy of a loser or a victim of circumstances.
You believe d-e-e-e-e-e-ply that you deserve less success and happiness. Here also you actually achieve what you believe.
Because of low self-esteem you came to remain in the breakdown state most often. Consequently, you believed more in your own faults and deficiencies. As a result, you got more abuses.
More abuses meant still lower self-esteem, more self-pity and more victim mentality. This caused more abuses.
Thus, this very destructive vicious circle of ‘abuse – breakdown - lower self-esteem – more abuse’ has been running your life till now.

What about a girl getting harassment in the in-laws’ home after marriage although she was never abused in the parents’ home?

  • It is again only because of one reason: Her self-esteem was unknowingly very low.
From early childhood she had been brought up in a conservative atmosphere of traditional values where she was directly or indirectly taught that
  • Girls were inferior to boys
  • She had to make sacrifices to keep her family happy
  • Family honor was above her personal pleasures
  • Come what may, she had to tolerate all injustices because this was her fate
  • She had to finally get married and stay married even if she was abused by her husband or in-laws
  • ‘What will people say’ was the most important criteria of her social existence
  • Being a woman she had no other choice other than to bear every indignity with patience
  • She must pretend socially that life was beautiful because her family name will be disgraced otherwise, etc.
With such an underlying value system she unconsciously developed a loser, victim or breakdown personality. Her sub-conscious vibrations were ‘My life is going to be hard, miserable and tough’.
  • Remember, outer world is the reflection of your inner world. So whatever she d-e-e-e-e-e-ply believed came true.
She was abused because she unconsciously expected to have a tough married life! Unknowingly, her parents and other elders had set the stage for her future victimization.
  • Here the fault is also not of the parents. They taught her what they had learnt from their parents! They in turn had acquired this value system from their own parents. The going back is endless. They were all victims of victims of victims of victims…!

I understand clearly now the role of my low self-esteem and my state of breakdown. I desperately want to come out of this situation. What should I do?

There are 2 ways to deal with this situation:

I] The first way of "Self-pity"

  • It is the usual socially acceptable way. 98% victims use this way and continue to suffer all their life. They want desperately but just never come out of the trap of low self-esteem – breakdown – abuse.
  • Your sad stories give you a lot of attention and sympathy from your near and dears undoubtedly. It is short term gain, but life long pain.
You feel good and relieved for some time when you share your horrible experiences with your well-wishers.
But that does not change the ground reality. You and your tormentors both do not change at all in this process – the old game continues in the future too. In fact, your torture gets worse as the months and years pass.
That’s why you find sooooooo many people around you living in abusive families or marriages for years together. They don’t dare to break their minds’ chains.
They go for short-term gain - which is to curse their fate, weep for some time, hope that one sweet day every thing will be all right and get others’ sympathy and attention for some time. But the whole life is wasted in life-long pain in this silly wait.

II] The second way of "Taking charge" of your own life

  • It is the way of short term pain, but life long gain. Only 2% victims dare to choose this road less traveled.
  • Only 2% victims dare to step out of their misery because in any change first step is the most difficult step.
It’s like you are trying to renovate your old house which had become quite unkempt over the years. It is a must that you push a big sofa to the next room for the new decor.
However, the sofa is very heavy. You try your might but you cannot do it alone. It is therefore much more comfortable to leave it as it was before in the same old room. But then the renovation and new décor cannot be done.
You just cannot leave it like that as you are actually very sick and tired of the old way of degenerated living. What to do?
So you request a friend to help you. You start pushing together. 51% of your physical energy is needed to just move the sofa a little bit.
Once it starts moving the momentum of movement itself helps you both to push it more and more easily. Soon this work is done. The new décor makes the home look so elegant and beautiful then.
You must have experienced something like this in your life by now. What do you say?
  • Same way 51% of your emotional and spiritual energy is spent in just taking the first step. And that step is simply deciding once for all that enough is enough from today and come what may, you will not accept any more mental or physical abuse henceforth.
This is the most critical step. This by itself changes the whole scenario slowly and steadily.
Then from the balance 49% energy the next step of learning various ways and techniques to improve your self-esteem and entering the breakthrough state follows easily.
  • Both paths of remaining a victim or choosing to take charge of your life are available to you. First you decide which path is suitable for you for a happier life. Accordingly you willingly go through the good or bad consequences of this life-changing decision.

But I feel that I immediately need a personalized guidance to deal with my tough situation. What to do now?

Then please contact Dr. Arora in this situation.
Dr. Arora, an awakened soul, will help you through his customized training on ‘7 Mind Secrets’. For the last more than 3 decades he has been helping people from all walks of life to lead a life of self-respect and self-love - without any medicines or surgery.
If you do feel a need for his personalized guidance to have a happy life then

Please CALL US TODAY for a FREE introductory personal session.

Sky is the limit for your growth if you start pulling your own strings from today.
You have nothing to loose other than your miserable abusive existence!




Jenish Gala,  16 yrs., Student

"I am very proud of joining Hope Academy. I have gained a lot like confidence & being assertive. My mother is very happy that I have opened up.
Your idea of having picturised theory is very interesting. It helps to remember fast and dosen't feel boring. My friends can't believe that I have changed so much.
I thank you very very much. Thanks once again Sir."

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